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April 24, 2017 by adbesserer

Synapses firing randomly

scrambled him on the inside

more than once

That muscle I heard inside his chest

is squeezing him hard

too hard

Now, cells dividing too quickly

threaten murder from the inside


It’s not the first time, friend

I’ve been used to make a man feel

more than a man,

letting himself out where he chooses,

or doesn’t.

But I’ll scratch his ears

like a shy Taiwanese dog

I’ll rub his back, sleepless

as he pigeon coos, puppy whimpers

smelling like the floor of a Northern Ontario bar

I’ll let him judge my body

when I become more than abstract;

I’ll let him be a miserable fuck

My mother would tell him

to suffer all lonely

for professing to know me,

for using me to feel like more than a man

by seeing what’s beneath my clothes,

for smiling as he voiced disappointment

when my tits didn’t flash like bulbs for a 999

But my light is as warm as this banana-shaped island

And I’m strong enough to know him better than he knows me

no matter how dark the sky feels

without stars

this one isn’t my best. it may be labelled confessional, or esoteric, but i wrote it. punctuation is hard. the subject matter is hard, but yeah. so just in case you didnt know, in taiwan you can get 2 hour rub and tugs for 999. the banana refers to the island, not some guy’s dick, and by more than a man i mean immortal.


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